Among the most challenging things a person can ask of themselves is to remain in a long-term, committed relationship. Disagreements, disputes, and clashes are unavoidable when you’re living with another person. The question is whether you and your partner value your relationship enough to survive the hard times.

Irrespective of your disagreements, your marriage does not have to end in divorce. Couples can learn how to overcome their conflicts, communicate more effectively, and rekindle the flame that once ignited their love through marriage therapy. It is essential to recognize that every marriage or long-term relationship needs a significant level of effort and commitment on both sides.

marriage therapy

Marriage therapy might well be your only chance of progressing as a couple if your marriage is on the rocks. Continue reading for 9 tell-tale signs that you should seek couples therapy.

1. You or your partner have lost interest in what you’re doing

Most people believe that hate is the antonym of love. Hate, on the other hand, gives a sense of passion and concern. As a result, the polar opposite of love is indifference, not hatred. Marriage therapy may be required if you or your partner have reached a stage in your marriage where you don’t care enough to fight or disagree.

This includes the following:

  • When your partner is upset, you don’t care in the slightest.
  • Rather than expressing your ideas, you’re rolling over on topics.
  • Having no desire to interact with the other
  • You don’t actually care if your sex life isn’t going well
  • Being unconcerned about infidelity (yours or theirs)
  • Independent lives that hardly ever collide
  • You don’t know where your husband is, and you don’t care
  • They have a general lack of interest in their lives
2. Virtually all communication is negative or results in fights

If you and your partner can’t seem to get along since every discussion ends in a quarrel or an argument, it’s a sign of a serious communication failure. This can result in one or both parties becoming oversensitive, defensive, or acting hurtfully when there isn’t a need to.

Genuine conversation and growth might be practically impossible in this kind of dysfunctional engagement. An experienced therapist might be able to assist you and your partner in learning how to recover from a nasty argument and how to communicate more effectively.

What To Do When Someone Lies In A Relationship

3. You or your partner is a liar or keeps secrets

Whenever people begin harbouring secrets from each other, marriage counselling may be required. Although complete honesty should be the objective of every marriage, there is an implicit understanding concerning white lies that can be tolerated.

Once partners begin to lie to one another or hold secrets about important matters, though, it may indicate a greater issue in the relationship. It could indicate that you don’t trust your partner anymore with specific knowledge or feelings or that you don’t care enough to talk openly with them.

4. There isn’t intimacy in your relationship

Following the initial years of marriage, all couples strive to maintain the same level of physical intimacy. It’s perfectly natural. If you find it difficult to be intimate with your partner or perceive a lack of interest in intimacy from them, it is probably time to seek out a marriage counsellor. A therapist can help you get things back on track if there is a lack of intimacy that both people are willing to work through.

5. You see each other as antagonists

If you or your partner views the other as the antagonist or the “bad guy”, you may benefit from marriage counselling. Human beings generally have a proclivity for adopting a “us versus them” mentality, continuously separating ourselves from others.

That is not how a healthy marriage works. Irrespective of who is to blame, you and your partner must accept that you are in this relationship together. You’re not rivals; you’re a team.

6. You or your partner has been unfaithful 

Cheating in a relationship can be a tough obstacle to overcome. It’s a betrayal of trust that won’t be readily repaired. Adulterous partners, on the other hand, seldom act without reason. 

Although we do not endorse or support infidelity, both couples must recognize that it is frequently the outcome of a marriage breakdown. This might refer to sexual activity, but it could also refer to emotional activity. Men who do not feel appreciated by their wives, as well as women who do not feel treasured by their husbands, are much more vulnerable to adultery. Loneliness, on the other hand, is the major cause of infidelity.

marriage therapy

7. You find yourself repeatedly having the same disagreement

Couples will have to deal with some challenges that will never go away. Couples will argue about these problems for the rest of their marriage. Humour, understanding, and respect are essential since these concerns are linked to underlying beliefs, temperament, and personality which are unchangeable.

Other issues are manageable but necessitate good compromise skills on both partners’ parts. Sometimes, a couple may need marriage therapy to assist them to distinguish between solvable and unsolvable challenges, as well as to gain the necessary skills to handle each.

8. You or your partner is lying about your financial situation

Lastly, though it may not appear to be a huge deal, hiding, lying, or harbouring financial secrets is a key symptom of relationship trouble. Financial infidelity is a reality, and lying about how you are spending your money is a major problem.

It’s generally common in younger relationships with separate accounts that each individual can do anything they want with their money. Making covert purchases, on the other hand, isn’t acceptable to the other partner when they share a bank account.

This involves opening bank accounts, getting credit cards, and applying for loans without the knowledge of the other person. This problem can be challenging since it can be both a permanent and a solvable problem.